im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
