My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
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