Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Randomize
