She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
