do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
