i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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