Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
