Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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