if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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