"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
