North Korea, Best Korea!
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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