More tranny stories later!
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize