Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
You don't make any sense
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