i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
