Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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