I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
