brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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