out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
