There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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