I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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