you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
