So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
