I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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