If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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