Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
