i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Randomize
