Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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