nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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