He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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