He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
