Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
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