she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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