We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
