This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
