she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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