I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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