Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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