her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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