i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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