I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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