I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
