normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
