i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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