I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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