It's Friday. Sex?
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
