maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize