20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
