I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
She told me I should be a condom model.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
