been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
