sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
